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Old 29 April 2006, 23:13
Posts: n/a
Originally Posted by Wench
You remind me of me when I was 15 and 16. About the only thing I can say is there's a whole lot of "I" and "me" in that. Realize it's not so much about you and what you can get out of the Army...more importantly, what do you do for the Army? It's a hypothetical that doesn't need a specific answer; it's the mindset. You're not going to get the job you want, so forget about it. Period. Once you move past that, focus on what you bring to the table (really good at languages? Computers? Do well with biology?) and how that can help support the warfighter. That's right, SUPPORT.
I can't. I'm sorry. I need to be the warfighter.

I tried to sign up before. A few months ago I walked into a recruiters office ready to sign an 89D or an 31A contract. I thought I had gotten past the whole dedicated door-kicker thing and I thought I could handle serving my country in a Support role. I was sitting in a chair waiting for a recruiter to open up when I saw one really scrawny incredibly pathetic looking dude with glasses sitting at one of the chairs and talking with a recruiter about an 11x with a ranger option. And he got it too!!!! I couldn’t believe he was even eligible for the army, he couldn’t have been older than 17 and weigh more than 120lbs! and he wasn’t a ripped 120, he was one of those tall lanky types. I try not to judge people by the outside, but you could tell he wasn't an athlete! I could have broken him over my knee and all he had to do was ask for an RIP and he got it. I just couldn’t take it, I got up and walked out. Maybe that was selfish of me.

Guys, I want to serve my country, I want to serve really bad but I can’t do it from behind a desk. Maybe there’s something wrong with me, but I just can’t take the whole sitting down fighting the war scene. Myself being very right brained and full of anger need to be moving around. It makes me restless just thinking about it and I’m even taking breaks from writing this post to get up and walk around. If my country really needed desk workers, I could probably suck it up and be a desk worker and what would keep me sane is that I’d know that I answered a call for desk workers, but the call was for door-kickers and that’s the one I want to answer.

I wish I could say that I had all my stuff together. I’m not a prep-school grad, I got kicked out of catholic school, my LAUSD gpa was a 3.00, my room is a mess, I pace when I’m restless, and I’m just about as unorganized as most 18 y/o’s that walk through the recruiters doors. I was one of the students who didn’t do as well as they could have in education because they were bored with school, and that’s my bad. I’m intelligent but too fiery, I have a lot of informed political opinions but state them at the wrong times, I push people into corners too much, I’m impatient and I’m not nice. I tried taking a desk job once but only lasted a day (at least I made it through the entire day) and am much happier painting houses with my dad. I’m not the “perfect recruit.” I’m hoping the military can make me one.

And maybe I am making this sound too much about “me.” Maybe I’m too egocentric. I don’t know. To sum it up, I’ll do anything to avoid a desk. I think I have a lot to offer my country, but if out of all the things they can ask of me, if they ask me to sit at a desk, my reply would be a heavy sight and “do I have to?” I'll serve my country any way they want me to, but it'll hurt me. I’m sorry I just have a real issue with the desk thing. Is there anything else I can do?...rephrase, is there anything else I’m allowed to do?

I’ve come across the thread posted above before and have skimmed it but haven’t read the entire 10 pages until now. Its mostly about Intel Positions. Not that I wouldn’t qualify for an intel job, I speak Albanianglish but could probably get fluent without much difficulty, and I think that eventually a lot of doors would open up and I’d get some excitement, but it just bothers me that I’d have to go the whole intel route, do a lot of sitting on my hands and watching the war on tv, and wait patiently for something to come along that might never come, when someone else just has to ask for something in their contract and get it instantly. I’m bothered guys, I’m bothered. I feel like a pitbull behind a fence. Its killing me!

Maybe the army is not for me, and maybe I’m not what they’re looking for, but at least I’m willing to be honest about my shortcomings and try to fix them for the sake of serving my country. When I say I want to fight the war, I know a lot of thankless work is being done by people not directly involved, and thank god for them, but what I mean is I want to get my hands dirty and I want to see combat.

I first looked into EOD since it was supposedly the second toughest school in the military and I’m very dexterous with my hands, but I don’t know if they have a combat mission. MP’s are seeing tons of action, but how challenging is MP? Women can be aerial gunners and fighter pilots, but not in the 160th (damn), but its still really high on my possible MOS list. I want a challenge. My friend said to me once almost as a joke that I should be a SERE specialist because I’d make a hell of an interrogator and I’d love the outdoor’s/physical part of it. If I didn’t want to fight the war so bad, I might have signed up for that a long time ago. Maybe I’m getting too held up on getting my hands dirty and seeing combat, I just want to get as close as possible. I can’t serve my country in a job I hate as well as I can in a job I love. I’m willing to go against my family and everyone who knows me. Irrational, immature, egocentric, maybe.

In 20 years I want to look back on my life and say I had a hell of a ride. In 10 years I either want to still be in the army having a hell of a ride or out making documentaries or writing for National Geographic or traveling or something challenging. In 5 years I want to either still be in the army or out of school starting my carreer. Tommorrow?-- I want to fight the war.