Need to vet ..my husband

[Cass]

Originally Posted by Agoge

Not knowing what his claims are specifically, the VA is currently running more claims than it has in years. Simply Google fraud, posers, and VA benefits and you will see how common it is.
.

I have for some years expected it is true that the VA is overwhelmed with applications submitted by the polished whom use the keyboard to seek VA remedies.

I know of a Frog friend whom never served overseas, yet he smooth-submitted his claims via his polished fingers and ended up with a VA comp. Whereas, in comparison, if I submitted I would get zilch because, fortunately, I never earned a Purple Heart, and I am not dick with a key board.

[lila222]

Originally Posted by The Corporate Guy

Good advice.

These are not little white lies. He's completely full of shit. Possibly criminal. If he lies to you about this, would you trust him in court? Make sure you cover yourself.



(The story is so far over the bullshit poser line that I originally questioned if your story was sincere or a troll job.)

I know it must sound that way to an outside observer. I guess I have just been with him for years and knew nothing of military operations or protocol prior to him- I've always just thought of him as an exaggerator but not a total liar- I can't believe he's been ballsy enough to fabricate such a lie, even to the point that actual military personnel have vouched for him and he makes such grandiose claims to the VA, DAV (they are helping him with his 100% disability claim) and even other active duty military personnel who are his friends in real life and no one's called him on it. I suspect he does have mental issues and I am keeping all this investigation hidden from him especially til I have conclusive evidence, and will be consulting a lawyer. Unfortunately I still have little hard evidence, just the general 'this can't be true' feeling.

[8654maine]

The PJ's on here can and will help you out.

However, I'll be the contrarian here and find your (lila222) kinda distasteful.

You know him as a "exaggerator" and "grandiose", suspect him of having "mental issues" yet have "been with him for years" and now all of a sudden this is distasteful.

Bullshit. I'm sure you've never lied to him as well.

Regardless of whether he is a poser or not, whatever happened to "for better or worse"?

What are you really trying to do?

[24/7]

Originally Posted by 8654maine

The PJ's on here can and will help you out.

However, I'll be the contrarian here and find your (lila222) kinda distasteful.

You know him as a "exaggerator" and "grandiose", suspect him of having "mental issues" yet have "been with him for years" and now all of a sudden this is distasteful.

Bullshit. I'm sure you've never lied to him as well.

Regardless of whether he is a poser or not, whatever happened to "for better or worse"?

What are you really trying to do?

Dude, my opinion...your post is way out of line.

[8654maine]

Originally Posted by 24/7

Dude, my opinion...your post is way out of line.

Fair enough. I expected it.

[leopardprey]

Originally Posted by 24/7

Dude, my opinion...your post is way out of line.

Not really, I think many here reading this probably had the same thought in the back of their minds.

The whole situation is pretty messed up on many levels.

[24/7]

Like I said, my opinion.

The lady has a suspicion that her husband (is at some level) a fraud. When my gut tells me that I'm being lied to I do the same thing, try to confirm.

[Cass]

Originally Posted by leopardprey

Not really, I think many here reading this probably had the same thought in the back of their minds.

The whole situation is pretty messed up on many levels.

To educate my SOCNET buddies, allow me, if I may.

I was one of the original Vetting Team of many years ago. I vetted so many distressed pleas from girlfriends and wives that I could tell the lies and bullshit upfront the male companion was trying to sell the female. To the degree there were even those posers whom came in pairs, with one telling the service lies and a second at another email address backing up the original lies.

In my own current hometown some geek passed himself off to his wife as a SEAL. I went at him via phone. His reason for being "unknown, unseen" was that he was "Black Ops" and he had been in BUDS Class 2. Which meant this geek should of been my age. No one is as old as me. Ultimately this fuckstick had his phone removed to get away from me.

In comparison my own wife knew little about my Military/Government history. I wanted it that way. Home was home and career was career. They did not have to mix for me to be pleased with my role in life. There was a point in my marriage when my wife pushed an issue. From this issue I realized my wife thought I was a clerk working for the boss (me). I let it go. She was a good wife.

I no longer vet service. Do not contact me. I cannot type. I do not know how to use a computer. I lie a lot.

[Fu King Lawyer]

Originally Posted by 8654maine

However, I'll be the contrarian here and find your (lila222) kinda distasteful.
...

Regardless of whether he is a poser or not, whatever happened to "for better or worse"?

What are you really trying to do?

8654 - regardless of her motives (and those of us on this site have been through our fair share break-ups and always wonder, what's really going on?) - if the underlying fact is that her husband, and two others, have been involved in defrauding the VA - she is to be supported for asking for help. She could be as mean as one of my ex's, but we owe it to the nation, to out the poser and try to restore integrity to the VA claims process. It's been a disaster.
...if on the other hand, this is all B.S., trust SOCNET to sort it all out.
JMHO
fkl

[lila222]

Originally Posted by 8654maine

Regardless of whether he is a poser or not, whatever happened to "for better or worse"?

What are you really trying to do?

Ok, I get this and I expected this a bit too. I'm aware that I'm being sneaky by investigating this and hiding it from him. It came up because someone contacted me and said he was reporting my husband for stolen valor. I don't know who this other person is, what his motivations are, or if he's full of it too. I have not responded to this other person and initially viewed him as just someone who didn't like my husband trying to cause issues. However, in the back of my mind, the doubts I'd had about my husband came back and I started looking into stolen valor. I did not realize the severity of it, that people had gone to jail over it, and that what I had thought of as harmless exaggeration could carry quite severe consequences. The more I looked into it myself, the more I realized he could quite well be defrauding the VA, which I'd (perhaps foolishly) thought was impossible. I have no military background, and I am out of my league. I did as much research on my own as I could, then came here and laid it all out. I wanted people to tell me I was wrong, to say how dare I question someone who had done so much good for our country. However, as I'm hearing, it sounds like he has deceived me and is stealing the benefits and respect that actual veterans deserve. I'm sure he did serve at some level, and I wish he had just left it at that. He would still have been a hero to me. But now that I've uncovered this, I'm angry that he lied and I'm overwhelmed by what to do. I didn't just come here on a whim one day to badmouth him. I've never posted any identifying info about him, as if my suspicions were wrong I didn't want anything on the internet that would slander his name. But now I'm in the position that I do love this man but my conscience tells me I can't just look the other way anymore. That's why I want to be absolutely certain before I do anything. Trust me, I want to be wrong. I want you to laugh me out of the room for doubting him. This is far from easy to hear. It also leaves me in the spot of now I have to do something. I can't just take his claims with a grain of salt anymore. My motivation in being here is something I've avoided confronting for years- whether there was a chance he was telling the truth. I thank you all for your insight, even it is doubtful or negative.

[Fu King Lawyer]

Originally Posted by Cass

In comparison my own wife knew little about my Military/Government history. I wanted it that way. Home was home and career was career. They did not have to mix for me to be pleased with my role in life. There was a point in my marriage when my wife pushed an issue. From this issue I realized my wife thought I was a clerk working for the boss (me). I let it go. She was a good wife.

I recall watching an examiner interview an American married to a foreign national. She had entered the US conditionally on a "green card" and they were petitioning to adjust her status to LPR. The examiner told the husband he was required to remain silent and then he commenced to query the foreign born spouse. She didn't have a lot of knowledge about finances (which is not unusual) but did have access to joint accounts and credit cards. Their drivers licenses matched and two cars were titled in both names. The examiner turned to more intimate details of the marriage and also asked about her husband's work, travels, associates, etc. He drew a blank from hher. Eying the husband (who kept silent), he moved in attempting to prove the marriage was a fraud. After 30 minutes or so of more questioning which revealed a total lack of familiarity with the husband's job, the examiner looked at the husband waiting for him to admit the marriage was a shame. At that point he asked the husband if he had anything to say. The husband produced his credentials and said that he was an intelligence officer for the Department of Defense. 10 minutes later her petition was approved.

[8654maine]

Originally Posted by lila222

Ok, I get this and I expected this a bit too. I'm aware that I'm being sneaky by investigating this and hiding it from him... I thank you all for your insight, even it is doubtful or negative.

Thank you for your post.

I understand a little better.

Tough decision.

[Cass]

Originally Posted by Fu King Lawyer

The husband produced his credentials and said that he was an intelligence officer for the Department of Defense. 10 minutes later her petition was approved.

I can understand the above. I had no credentials in my latter career.
Often VIP's or lateral Ops Managers would pass thru my town for briefings. It was an expected and pleasurable task to invite the overnight motel visitor to my home for dinner and drinks. This was both a professional expectation and a welcome to many Ops Managers a distance from the core Ops crowd. However, it was a given that as I may be driving my guest group to my home it was always asked as a matter of security, "Is your wife witting?" Meaning, how much does she know so we as the guests can limit our social conversation. I easily advised that my wife knew for whom I worked, but not my ops or mission. ~ This was an easy given. My wife knew nothing about Government, Black Ops, Cover Stories, handsome husbands. The Unit I was C/Station was way out from the Intel Crowd. She just wanted a good guy and I hope I have done that.

[CPTAUSRET]

Cass:

Brother, my money is on you being a great husband!

Terry

[B 2/75]

Cass, you've been an example of how to be a real Man & Husband that any and all of us can only hope to emulate.


Lila222, If you've determined to move forward with plumbing and exposing the depths of your husband's deceit, then there are people here on SOCnet who can help you with that.

Best thing is to keep all personally-identifying information off the open net, and communicate mostly by the private messaging system here.

Rest assured that having a General Discharge, even if under honorable conditions, is NEVER code for anything other than what amounts to his having been kicked out of the service. He was an undesirable, but not bad enough to get himself a Dishonorable discharge.

If his DD214 says he got out in 1998, that's when he ended his active duty. It is possible that he had more service as a Reservist or in the National Guard, but in 98 we were still reducing the size of the force, they were in no way eager to retain people. Getting into the Guard or Reserves as a General Discharge type would have been... likely impossible.

Are you uncertain as to what your husband was doing for work from 98 onward? If you can find his tax records, look at who issued his W2 forms for each tax year. It is a sure bet that none of them are from the military. Maybe he was doing his Black Ops for free? Or maybe they were so classified that he was paid by a shell company called Pete's Trucking?

[MakoZeroSix]

Originally Posted by lila222

Hi, I am married to a man who claims to have been a PJ in the late 90s/2000s but recently I am starting to question his claims. He has shown me his DD214 with a discharge date of 10/7/98 after only 3 years' service but he states he went into black ops and this is not reflected on his DD214 (which gives a general discharge under honorable conditions for misconduct and he says misconduct is a code for going into black ops). I didn't really buy this explanation even initially, but now he has successfully claimed VA disability (there are 2 other guys who supposedly served with him who testified on his behalf that while his service records indicated a discharge date of 1998, he actually was completing missions through 2008). Is this even possible, that the VA would accept this testimony in lieu of actual records? He also states that he has been awarded several medals including MOH but they will only be awarded posthumously due to the secrecy of his work.

I believed him as I thought the VA system was pretty foolproof but now I have been reading up on all the imposter veterans and he uses a lot of the same lines/stories and now I'm worried that he might be a fraud. I am especially worried as I work in a profession regulated by the federal gov't and DEA and I am worried I could get in trouble if he is actually defrauding the VA system though I have no evidence one way or the other as he claims it's all classified. He claims to have been mentored by a particular general with whom he remains in touch; I've seen a picture of him with this general, but have never heard him actually speak to him on the phone or anything. Among other things, he claims he was the only airman to graduate marine sniper school and that he has a TC/SCI/SSBI clearance which is why he can't access any of his service records.

I believed him as I thought the VA system was pretty foolproof but now I have been reading up on all the imposter veterans and he uses a lot of the same lines/stories and now I'm worried that he might be a fraud. I am especially worried as I work in a profession regulated by the federal gov't and DEA and I am worried I could get in trouble if he is actually defrauding the VA system though I have no evidence one way or the other as he claims it's all classified. I will be happy to PM name, dob, any other personal details that may help. I have a few pictures he claims are of him in service but I have my doubts about a couple of them based on my own research. I am no expert though, and I need someone more knowledgeable in the area to tell me if there's even a chance what he's claiming may be true.

I hate to even do this, but it has gotten to the point where I'm questioning him and I need to know if he's actually a veteran (which I hope to be true) or a fraud. Thank you so much in advance.

Hey, this sounds kind of familiar to me. You guys didn't used to live in Ormond Beach and are swingers, are you?

[Fu King Lawyer]

I'm asking. Will one of the BTDT PJs on this Board PM lila222, get his PII data, and actually verify that he is a poser? It's more than important. Once that which we all know to be true is done, please PM me.

[Sgt Jeep]

lila222,

Are you legit in your questions, or trying to set up (a) SOCNET member(s) or your 'husband'? I'm skeptical in you posting here as this site isn't common knowledge.

How did you come to SOCNET? Prior military? Your profile and intro post was lacking in this info. I only ask these questions as this forum is special to me and I don't want to see any members get screwed over.

If you are legitimate in your quest this is the place to get your answers.

[lila222]

Originally Posted by Sgt Jeep

lila222,

Are you legit in your questions, or trying to set up (a) SOCNET member(s) or your 'husband'? I'm skeptical in you posting here as this site isn't common knowledge.

How did you come to SOCNET? Prior military? Your profile and intro post was lacking in this info. I only ask these questions as this forum is special to me and I don't want to see any members get screwed over.

If you are legitimate in your quest this is the place to get your answers.

I know you said to disregard your post, but I want to emphasize I know you all get these posts often and yes this forum isn't easy to find. I have been researching as much as I could find about his claims, and I figured if I am going to find out the truth, this is the place to do it. I am more than happy to give any information about me via PM so you can feel comfortable I am not here for malicious reasons. I have no military experience besides a great respect for what you all and others have done. I am here because I can no longer in good conscience ignore my concerns. I would love it if someone told me, yes I served with him, yes he's legit. My fear, especially the more I read, is that he's not. It breaks my heart. I would love to hear that the basic premise of his service is true, even if he embellished the details a little. Then I could with a clear conscience say to any of his detractors, this is my husband who has served his country and is a good man. I tell myself, maybe in those 3 years, some horrific event happened that qualified him for 80% disability from PTSD and he gets all this legitimately. But I'm also a realist. I am more than grateful for all the insights and things I haven't thought about, and even just the knowledge that I'm not completely off target in questioning some of his claims.

I have also been looking into the 2 guys who vouched for him, and one in particular concerns me. It has occurred to me that perhaps my husband isn't the only one these guys have helped.

[lila222]

Originally Posted by MakoZeroSix

Hey, this sounds kind of familiar to me. You guys didn't used to live in Ormond Beach and are swingers, are you?

Lol, no sorry, that is one thing I can say with certainty that isn't us. :)