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  #21  
Old 27 November 2017, 22:24
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Originally Posted by Expatmedic View Post
For me it started with me not sleeping for a month. That was thought to be a manic phase. Went and saw my doc and gave me a referral. But, as I know now, there were signs: Overspending, hyperfocused on an item, hobby etc, no real hypersexuality, if anything asexual.

I am trying to figure out if I was misdiagnosed, the meds are working, I have created coping skills all or none of the above.

Perhaps the downs did more damage, but the highs served me very well being a Paramedic. Sleep not necessary and I would work 3-4 24hour shifts in a row.
Many artists and writers are bi-Polar and do their best work while in manic states. But, it really can result in over-confidence to the point of disaster.
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  #22  
Old 28 November 2017, 06:47
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Many artists and writers are bi-Polar and do their best work while in manic states. But, it really can result in over-confidence to the point of disaster.
My mother's manic out of control spiral, that always led to police being called started when she started sleeping less, began rearranging the house-half the crap ended up on the front yard, and her talking about plans to get a job or travel somewhere, then she would occasionally rage at the neighbors-to include threatening them, followed by delusions. She would then end up at the state mental facility for a week or two to get leveled out. BUT-she was hyper sensitive to medication, had no medical insurance and was really quite personally dysfunctional so she did not manage herself well...Mental illness is no joke, but she had a role to play in how she behaved. She really had no willingness to be introspective, and to be fair, her upbringing, was so chaotic and painful in many ways...that she was set up for emotional problems from her first few days of life.
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  #23  
Old 29 November 2017, 00:39
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The person is me.
Smart and courageous man -- knowing when and where to ask for help. Keep paying attention and working smart. Good thoughts sent for 11/30.

Be well,
SM
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  #24  
Old 29 November 2017, 07:07
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Everyone is fucking bi-polar IMO, its only a matter of to what degree. Shrinks in my area are only prescription writers who herd you in & out like cattle, have large clientele and charge your insurance $110 for a 20 minute visit.

Now that I have depressed you even more, good luck in your medication management. Personally, I just take anxiety meds so I can deal with all the stupid fucking people I must ignore on a daily basis.
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  #25  
Old 29 November 2017, 13:53
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Everyone is fucking bi-polar IMO, its only a matter of to what degree.
I pretty much think the same. I know I have a lot of the signs, but so far I've managed to stay out of the nut house and prison.

But, I look back on some crazy periods in my life and I can't help but wonder if they were the result of some manic episodes. Nothing else really explains it.
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  #26  
Old 29 November 2017, 16:09
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Seriously. Look into nutrition and the brain. Far better if you can fix issues with nutrition then subject oneself to the hellish side effects of some of those meds. When my mom went down the spiral while living in Canada, they put her on something that caused her Fking intense cravings for sugar. She ate nothing but this cheap white cake she bought at a local convenience store for months until I got to her. Her teeth were destroyed and I helped her buy dentures.
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  #27  
Old 29 November 2017, 23:22
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Seriously. Look into nutrition and the brain. Far better if you can fix issues with nutrition then subject oneself to the hellish side effects of some of those meds. When my mom went down the spiral while living in Canada, they put her on something that caused her Fking intense cravings for sugar. She ate nothing but this cheap white cake she bought at a local convenience store for months until I got to her. Her teeth were destroyed and I helped her buy dentures.

I think there is a connection there. Have a family member on Effexor, Topomax & Wellbutrin. They're diet is all screwed up and craves/eats sweets constantly.
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  #28  
Old 30 November 2017, 07:42
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I think there is a connection there. Have a family member on Effexor, Topomax & Wellbutrin. They're diet is all screwed up and craves/eats sweets constantly.
Please look up nutrition and mental health and depression.
Look at the link I posted previously.

For instance, from this article: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2738337/

"Few people are aware of the connection between nutrition and depression while they easily understand the connection between nutritional deficiencies and physical illness. Depression is more typically thought of as strictly biochemical-based or emotionally-rooted. On the contrary, nutrition can play a key role in the onset as well as severity and duration of depression. Many of the easily noticeable food patterns that precede depression are the same as those that occur during depression. These may include poor appetite, skipping meals, and a dominant desire for sweet foods.[1] Nutritional neuroscience is an emerging discipline shedding light on the fact that nutritional factors are intertwined with human cognition, behavior, and emotions.
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  #29  
Old 1 December 2017, 10:42
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Look at mdical MJ have a friend that is BP1 and got med MJ for migraines.
Stuff worked so well the doc took this person off three headache meds. And also dropped two anxiety meds and decreased the dosage of BP meds.

The hard part with the MJ is figuring out the dosage. Luckily my friend takes managment of symptoms seriously and really worked hard to figure out how much and what strain to use.
I wish you the best.
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  #30  
Old 3 December 2017, 03:03
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Expat Medic I am sorry that you are dealing with bipolar problems, and glad that you are seeking help. Are you a candidate for a long acting medication like Risperdal Consta or Invega Sustenna?
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  #31  
Old 3 December 2017, 03:49
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So, can anyone recommend a newer medication that may manage this better than Lamictal?
I have bipolar disorder. Pm me any time. I can definitely help. But lamictal almost killed me so I wouldn't recommend it anyways.
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  #32  
Old 4 December 2017, 13:33
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Well, chatted with the MD about being misdiagnosed and were sticking with the Bipolar DX. Aspergers is not there based on his assessment. Sticking with Lamictal. Lithium is not an option as it is toxic for me at a less than therapeutic dose.

Added Anafranil. Not due to any rituals but because my brain never turns off. Lots of recurrent thoughts, images that have never gone away. These get relived many times a day.

So far, he is taking an add or delete one med at a time approach. That makes sense to me.

For me, I am not experiencing highs at all, but a constant lack of motivation to do the most basic things. Very low energy and fatigue.

Taking P36's advice, looking at adding a lot more Salmon then taking a supplement of Omega 3's and Zinc to start. See what that does then add some Mag, D's and B's in the future.

So, that is where we are.

Thank you to all that have reached out.
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  #33  
Old 4 December 2017, 23:42
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Originally Posted by Expatmedic View Post
Not due to any rituals but because my brain never turns off. Lots of recurrent thoughts, images that have never gone away. These get relived many times a day.

So far, he is taking an add or delete one med at a time approach. That makes sense to me.

For me, I am not experiencing highs at all, but a constant lack of motivation to do the most basic things. Very low energy and fatigue.
I can help with this part. Sending a PM in just a moment.
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  #34  
Old 11 December 2017, 11:37
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Well, the Anafranil is working very well. The thoughts that played over and over in my head for days on end are gone. Now they are just fleeting thoughts. The downside is sleep is not going so well, but I am going to up my Seroquel.

I want to say thank you to everyone. People took the time to post good info and many PM'd and shared their experiences with me.

I am grateful.
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  #35  
Old 26 December 2017, 14:35
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I'm suprised with your background in EMS that they would not be looking harder at PTSD.

25 years ago we didnt talk about the bad runs. We found something in it to laugh about and moved on to the next one. The only time managment though about CISM was when it was a pile of dead kids on the 6pm news and it was not helpful. But its not the big things events that get to you its the cumulative pile of corpses you file away in your subconscious. A death by a thousand papercuts if you will.
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  #36  
Old 26 December 2017, 23:41
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Again, get the testosterone checked and get away from the processed sugars. Probiotics are good for serotonin levels as well as a 'B' complex for depression and stay away from the alcohol if you are on the bipolar meds. Clean eating is key. Lots of good information on this thread. I hope this tid bit helps in some way. We are here for you!
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  #37  
Old 27 December 2017, 13:41
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Good News

Thanks to everyone for the guidance and help.

The last 1.5-2.0 years have been rough. For me, my wife and our marriage.

But, after being on Anafranil for a bit I have my old life back. I am no longer cranky at the drop of a hat. I am calm when rough things come up. I have more energy and I am not sleeping the weekends away. Getting up and making my wife breakfast, more hugging and hand holding. I am calm in the face of adversity. Bad/rough thoughts are fleeting and given their due regard and gone in seconds. I am able to meditate and almost go to sleep in seconds after closing my eyes. It feels like a Benzo.

Sometimes I felt like I was dying inside. I did not realize how miserable I was until I got better.

I am also taking Seroquel for sleep and mood. Gabapentin has been added as well. Anafranil saved my life.

Anyhow, thank you all.
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Winter is here again oh Lord,
Haven't been home in a year or more
I hope she holds on a little longer
Sent a letter on a long summer day
Made of silver, not of clay
I've been runnin' down this dusty road

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Got to make it before too long
I can't take this very much longer
I'm stranded in the sleet and rain
Don't think I'm ever gonna make it home again.
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  #38  
Old 12 January 2018, 15:13
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Just saw this post, and I want to thank you for being man enough to reach out. There is nothing to be embarrassed about. And this may help others who are unwilling to share. I wish you the best with your meds. You do bring up a very interesting and salient point; how do you know how normal feels if you never felt it before?
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  #39  
Old 23 January 2018, 18:35
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I wanted to follow up again and add more info. Many people have posted in this thread and via PM some I have never talked to. I need to thank you all for your guidance.

The Anafranil still gets the label of "life-changing". The only downside is I now talk in my sleep. No,really. Never in my life have I talked before, based on what GF's and 2 wives have told me. Now, I am still in a twilight stage of sleep and talking coherently. I wake myself from sleep while having lucid conversation.

Before the Anafranil I can say I might have had 1-2 dreams per year, now they are about 1 per 2-3 days.

ETA: I also was given a battery of questions admin'd by a post-doctoral, PsyD. She is working her magic on what it all means. About an hour of questions by her, then a 600 T/F test. Then a multiple choice test, about 850 questions not including her verbal battery.

I will post in this thread as helpful information comes up.

Thank you to ALL, you know who you are.
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Winter is here again oh Lord,
Haven't been home in a year or more
I hope she holds on a little longer
Sent a letter on a long summer day
Made of silver, not of clay
I've been runnin' down this dusty road

I've been trying to make it home
Got to make it before too long
I can't take this very much longer
I'm stranded in the sleet and rain
Don't think I'm ever gonna make it home again.

Last edited by Expatmedic; 23 January 2018 at 18:43.
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  #40  
Old 23 January 2018, 22:58
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A wide range of meds cause dreams/nightmares. I tried Ambien once for about 2 weeks. I was having Rob Zombie like nightmares. Even had a medical Doctor tell me she couldn't take it for the same reason.

I know Ambien wouldn't help your bi-bolar disorder, I'm just agreeing with you. Benzos does the same thing to me. But, I kinda like my nighttime adventures.
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