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  #321  
Old 27 November 2018, 13:11
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jasonglh jasonglh is offline
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Iíve been gagged
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  #322  
Old 27 November 2018, 14:11
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Sharky Sharky is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Maas View Post
So Jason let me know he got 50/50 custody with his son. So his daughter will get to spend lots of time with him.

Maas


Great news!
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When I hit the ground I was on the run
I had one glad hand and the other behind
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When the hound dog barkin' in the black of the night
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  #323  
Old 30 November 2018, 10:21
EShepp EShepp is offline
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Anybody have any contacts or recommendations for someone to speak to in the Virginia Beach area?
Professional or semi-professional. Doesn't matter.
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  #324  
Old 30 November 2018, 11:52
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The Fat Guy The Fat Guy is offline
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Originally Posted by EShepp View Post
Anybody have any contacts or recommendations for someone to speak to in the Virginia Beach area?
Professional or semi-professional. Doesn't matter.
We have lots of folks in VA, someone one should be along soon with a recommendation.
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  #325  
Old 3 December 2018, 12:24
EShepp EShepp is offline
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Much appreciated.
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  #326  
Old 3 December 2018, 13:27
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Sharky Sharky is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by EShepp View Post
Much appreciated.


You talking about counseling, or what?
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I was born my papa's son
When I hit the ground I was on the run
I had one glad hand and the other behind
You can have yours, just give me mine
When the hound dog barkin' in the black of the night
Stick my hand in my pocket, everything's all right

-ZZ Top
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  #327  
Old 4 December 2018, 22:11
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GPC GPC is offline
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Originally Posted by EShepp View Post
Anybody have any contacts or recommendations for someone to speak to in the Virginia Beach area?
Professional or semi-professional. Doesn't matter.
Vet Centers are a great option.
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  #328  
Old 14 March 2019, 10:20
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Terry Welshan Terry Welshan is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sharky View Post
As I pointed out to someone else.....although it is hilarious to watch, I can also appreciate the fact that they are obviously fucking terrified and yet they jumped anyway. That takes balls to overcome that level of fear.
Sharky posted this in the African Paratrooper thread but it struck a chord with me as it relates to this thread. We have all heard the meme that suicide is a cowardly act. Yet I think the above quote may have more truth to the number of our SOF brethren who have chosen to face it.
They have faced and overcome things most would be terrified of trying and altho misguided I wonder if they look at the end of life as one more challenge to be overcome ?
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  #329  
Old 15 March 2019, 10:21
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leopardprey leopardprey is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Terry Welshan View Post
Sharky posted this in the African Paratrooper thread but it struck a chord with me as it relates to this thread. We have all heard the meme that suicide is a cowardly act. Yet I think the above quote may have more truth to the number of our SOF brethren who have chosen to face it.
They have faced and overcome things most would be terrified of trying and altho misguided I wonder if they look at the end of life as one more challenge to be overcome ?
Not really, I think it has more to do with going from 100 mph to
0 mph. From Hero to Zero. Loss of a mission, loss of a tribe, loss of feeling of purpose, once top of the peak physically to now getting old, broken, failing health. Just being another "civilian". Loss of purpose that no civilian job can hold. Regrets from sacrifices made.

The constant living on the edge, the constant being on the lookout, the war set mind for years - now in a civilian world/USA and that mind set is still there but the outlet is not. Seeing others succeed and have all the success in life, yet they never served/stepped to the plate. Questioning where is the justice in it all? Coming back and seeing our nation erode in terms of values, and questioning why wasted time overseas. Questioning why you survived yet others with more to lose, lost their lives or disfigured.

Now the years are gone. One feeling no hope, no way to move forward. Constant nightmares. People say talk, but action is needed. We don't need the Hooter's waitress telling us thanks for our service, we need her going home with us. We don't need thanks, we need a job with a purpose. SOF vets need recognition, respect, health and jobs from their time down range as a service member or contractor. The SOF/contractor bet misses their time down range and realizes that was the highlight of their life, where they belonged - not stuck in suburbia or a cubicle/office job doing nothing of importance and their two week vacation a year.

These are the things that make a SOF veteran feel at odds, get depressed and despair till the end. Then it becomes the domino effect, one problem creates another and another. Many single vets with no good woman to pull them through, left alone. The loneliness and emptiness. When there seems their usefulness is used up, their dignity and respect gone. No one cares or just gives lip service. That then becomes the end game, when death seems the only way out.

So make a plan, find a way out. Try not to look at the past. Find a new passion. Get a hobby that consumes your time. Get back to nature, into nature. Turn off the TV. Pack your bags and leave. Go get a young girl in the PI or Thailand to spend time with. Don't envy others. Learn to be content. Make friends with other SOF veterans, real friends - not just on the internet. Go help others. End the bitterness. End the substance abuses. Try to exercise if you physically still can. Read more books. Realize death will come soon enough, no need to quicken it. See VA for pain mitigation. Try. Try again. Fall down, get up. Try again.
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Last edited by leopardprey; 15 March 2019 at 10:33.
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  #330  
Old 15 March 2019, 11:16
Chesie Chesie is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by leopardprey View Post
your post
LP,

I think your post has a lot of truth to it, but I also think there is something we aren't quite capturing when we describe PTSD and suicidal ideation with our most-elite SM's. I don't think we build proper resiliency skills in our regular service members, but our SOF guys have, through weeding out the weak, developed tremendous resiliency skills during their careers. Yet, they are still affected by their time in service and have problems re-adjusting to civilian life.

I don't know this, but based on my personal observations this is what I think may be taking place. I think brain chemistry changes, and the neural pathways SOF bubbas use to process emotional stimuli changes over time. The ability to live in the grey world of civilian life is difficult, when for years decisions seem black and white. They go from rapid decision making, often over life-and-death scenarios, to processing complex, often mundane problems over time in the civilian world.

I have now spent two combat deployments far away from base, embedded with some of the best warriors our country has ever produced, and as the senior medical dude, the guys that need to talk quietly gravitate to me. The common theme is that they are stressed over seemingly small things (usually back home), but they don't want to discuss how it is affecting them with their teammates, because they don't want to appear weak. They also don't want to leave theater, lest they let their bubbas down. But they need help with the stress; not war stress, but home stress.

But what I see isn't really a coping mechanism breakdown; these guys are applying TTPs learned in war and trying to apply them to civilian life problems. They have lost the patience to develop the situation, probably because no one ever taught them how.

What I would love to see with our SOF forces coming home is peer-developed resiliency, where we teach patience and the ability to understand better our loved ones' perspectives. We do such a good job teaching these guys self-sufficiency, working as a team towards a common goal, and ... warfighting. But we have let these guys down, because we don't teach them how to get off the war horse, and how to live life, after war, with the same enthusiasm they applied to their lives during war.

This is just an observation, and I do not intend to stir the shit-pot of AD vs guard/reserve, but the NG SF guys all seemed to do better with the "home life" and transitioning away from theater than the AD SOF bubbas. I think the intermittent doses of civilian life and "normal" human interactions helps these guys relate. The deployment tempos are similar, so it isn't an accumulation of war that seems to be the problem. As LP alluded to, I think the AD guys live in the military world exclusively for so long, that their brains forget how to process stimuli like a civilian.

And I think this difference in re-acclimation would be an excellent topic for psychologists to study. The answer is in there, somewhere.

This topic is very important to me, both personally and professionally.

V/R,
Danny
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